As I delved into my research on film spectatorship and anhedonia, a theme started to emerge. As I think back on my experiences and the things that have influenced me, I realise that I have been particularly drawn to the intense darkness of certain shows and films that have had a profound impact on me. The narratives I encountered were instrumental in shaping my final idea, as they featured intricate characters and explored profound themes.
I got the idea for my project after watching some really thought-provoking films and TV shows that delved into the complexities of being human. Black Mirror (2005) and Black Swan (2010) have had a significant impact due to their thought-provoking narratives and exploration of societal and psychological themes. I was absolutely captivated by the colour grading, soundtracks, and performances in these works. They really emphasised the power of dark themes in storytelling.
During this time, I frequently found myself writing in my journal about the emotional effect these stories had on me. The way they depicted mental health struggles, not just as plot lines but as integral parts of the story, really resonated with me. As I thought about it, I wondered how I could craft a story that would have a similar impact. I was interested in delving into a character's struggles, both within themselves and with the outside world, in a manner that was engaging and true to life.
I naturally arrived at the idea of centering the story around a girl with schizophrenia during my contemplations. Schizophrenia provides a wide range of experiences that can be drawn upon, with its profound and often misunderstood effects on perception and reality. I wanted to capture her journey with a conversational and simple tone, steering clear of clichés and instead, offering a nuanced perspective on her challenges and strength.
Shows like The Responder (2024) and Six Feet Under (2005) had a significant impact as well. The way they balanced darkness with moments of light and humanity served as a guide for my narrative structure. These shows showed how to mix intense, sometimes distressing topics with relatable, humanising aspects.
While working on the storyline, I paid attention to the visual and auditory aspects that could make the narrative more emotionally impactful. I was influenced by the soft colour palette and subtle contrasts in "Baby Reindeer," as well as the powerful soundtracks in American Beauty (1999) and A Beautiful Mind (2001) I wanted to capture the essence of the protagonist's inner world, which is both chaotic and poignant, fragmented yet filled with hope.
During this process, I came to understand that my project involved more than just storytelling - it was about crafting an engaging and immersive experience. I aimed to create an experience for the audience where they could truly empathise with the protagonist's disorientation, fear, and moments of clarity. This approach I took for my project was heavily influenced by my research on how people engage with films on a physical and emotional level.
In the end, my journaling and reflection helped me gain a better grasp of how personal and artistic influences can mould a story. The shows I loved had a darkness that not only inspired me thematically, but also served as a guide for my approach. I aim to combine these elements to create a story that is easy to follow and have meaningful conversations about. The story will provide insights into the intricate world of schizophrenia and evoke strong emotions.
I got the idea for my project after watching some really thought-provoking films and TV shows that delved into the complexities of being human. Black Mirror (2005) and Black Swan (2010) have had a significant impact due to their thought-provoking narratives and exploration of societal and psychological themes. I was absolutely captivated by the colour grading, soundtracks, and performances in these works. They really emphasised the power of dark themes in storytelling.
During this time, I frequently found myself writing in my journal about the emotional effect these stories had on me. The way they depicted mental health struggles, not just as plot lines but as integral parts of the story, really resonated with me. As I thought about it, I wondered how I could craft a story that would have a similar impact. I was interested in delving into a character's struggles, both within themselves and with the outside world, in a manner that was engaging and true to life.
I naturally arrived at the idea of centering the story around a girl with schizophrenia during my contemplations. Schizophrenia provides a wide range of experiences that can be drawn upon, with its profound and often misunderstood effects on perception and reality. I wanted to capture her journey with a conversational and simple tone, steering clear of clichés and instead, offering a nuanced perspective on her challenges and strength.
Shows like The Responder (2024) and Six Feet Under (2005) had a significant impact as well. The way they balanced darkness with moments of light and humanity served as a guide for my narrative structure. These shows showed how to mix intense, sometimes distressing topics with relatable, humanising aspects.
While working on the storyline, I paid attention to the visual and auditory aspects that could make the narrative more emotionally impactful. I was influenced by the soft colour palette and subtle contrasts in "Baby Reindeer," as well as the powerful soundtracks in American Beauty (1999) and A Beautiful Mind (2001) I wanted to capture the essence of the protagonist's inner world, which is both chaotic and poignant, fragmented yet filled with hope.
During this process, I came to understand that my project involved more than just storytelling - it was about crafting an engaging and immersive experience. I aimed to create an experience for the audience where they could truly empathise with the protagonist's disorientation, fear, and moments of clarity. This approach I took for my project was heavily influenced by my research on how people engage with films on a physical and emotional level.
In the end, my journaling and reflection helped me gain a better grasp of how personal and artistic influences can mould a story. The shows I loved had a darkness that not only inspired me thematically, but also served as a guide for my approach. I aim to combine these elements to create a story that is easy to follow and have meaningful conversations about. The story will provide insights into the intricate world of schizophrenia and evoke strong emotions.
I've realized that while I was pouring my heart and soul into my final outcome video, critical report, and PDF, my blog was definitely falling behind. There were times when I didn’t properly explain my process or how I got there.
Once I decided to make my film about schizophrenia, I found it challenging to make it both educational and entertaining. I was piecing together different story and video elements, which led me to go for a film-style immersive experience. It’s part film, part explanation of the immersive elements. However, I felt my script was lacking and needed a more engaging storyline. Writing scripts isn’t my strong suit, and I ended up rewriting it multiple times.
Including explanation slides in my video made it much longer, leaving little time for other parts of the video. I loved putting the animated elements together, but I still feel my work is more style over substance. I have big ideas but struggle with execution. To enhance the immersive experience, I added a few jump scares, but I couldn’t add enough depth to character development. The whole thing felt rushed as I was trying to keep the video short.
For the soundtrack, I chose some emotional music inspired by "One Day" (2024), "A Beautiful Mind" (2001), and "American Beauty" (1999). These tracks matched the style and ambience I was going for. After weeks of journaling and feeling a bit like a film critic, I realized that creating something entertaining and good is really hard. My video and storyline lacked depth and were rushed. Unnecessary jump scares were included, and my After Effects skills were lacking, making the final outcome feel amateur.
Aesthetics are important to me; I love bright, bold, artistic looks. I tried to achieve this, but the storyline was simple and inane. I decided to base my film on drug-induced psychosis and delusions rather than schizophrenia itself. Inspired by the twist in Black Swan (2010) I wanted a similar twist in my story, so my character experiences drug-induced delusions.
In the end, I'm not sure how my experience relates to anhedonia, but I felt horror was the way to go. My project and write-up feel disjointed because my development process is all over the place—jumping from one idea to another quickly.
I haven't detailed too much of the film here because I don’t want to give away the storyline, especially since I don’t know when you’ll watch it. This is just a rough outline of my project.
I incorporated features from my research into film spectatorship, like editing, sound design, and cinematography to create a foreboding atmosphere. Emotive music and eerie sound effects portray her delusions, and I used dulled-down grey color palettes to represent the darkness of mental illness. I aimed to make the experience as immersive as possible by describing smells, sounds, temperature changes, and adding atmospheric effects. Holographic effects worked well with the theme of psychosis.
However, I still feel my script was lacking and could have been more descriptive. This is something I know I’ll need to keep working on.